wtf america?

i would like to think i hung up my metaphorical feminist boxing gloves after college but indeed i recently found uses for them again...now. it is true i actually don't watch tv on a regular basis per se but imma gonna bitch about this anyway. because i can.

this week commemorates nbc's decision to bump conan o'brien and the tonight's show back one half hour for jay leno, who is apparently bombing in his current time slot.
ok. jay leno is a super creepster. as evidenced by this photo:
maybe that is why his ratings could be down? he is scaring young children and people that stay awake and watch tv during normal evening hours? i dunno. this is just my theory.

then it made me think...television is filled with creepy dudes. i would totally watch more tv if i had hot dudes to look at. i would even watch espn. seriously. there is one hot dude on espn and he's kind of a dipshit and this guy is all over the place....

the females on espn? effing gorgeous. NO attempts are made whatsoever to engage the female population into espn...it is a freaking travesty i tell you.

i also happen to enjoy some current events talk and banter. and we get this guy for the last majillion years?! SERIOUSLY. would an equally bland and gawky female make it on a show like larry king's larry king live? hell to the no. totally unfair.

and i dig me some politics. but they have even turned my darling anderson cooper into a cheeseball and i feel like this guy gets more screen time. THERE IS SOMETHING WRONG HERE.

i disagreed with everything that came out of tucker carlson's mouth but i was all about the jerkface cause he was dreamy....why aren't our needs as women objectifying men being met on television people? just burns me up.

i mean, we've got jon stewart and steven colbert. i will never take them for granted. and jimmy fallon is oh so nice. but then there is that weirdo british or scottish guy on late late night show, a handful of marginally attractive mainstream new anchormen and that crap that keeps me away from espn. IT IS JUST WRONG.

so i hate you television. i will continue to rent netflix and be surprised when they come in the mail cause i'm all like, hmmm. this movie looks totally lame. why would i rent this? then when the credits appear and joseph gordon-levitt or christian bale or gael garcia bernal's name is shown my ah-ha! moment is realized. i rented it cause it had a hot dude in it. it's a week night, i am tired and i need some hot dude to take the edge off from the day.

totally acceptable and accessible for men, not so much for us, ladies. it is a cruel world.

so, in conclusion, my sincerest apologies conan o'brien. you, with your ridiculously long legs and awkward hair...i'll miss your face and your presence in the lives of so many other women who "just think he's funny" and pretend like aren't completed enamoured with his super hot irishness. i like it when you side stare and make appearances on 30 rock. actually, YOU rock.

after all these years we ladies still can't get an equal break when it comes sex appeal needs. boo, america. boo for you.