daddy's girl...part 1.

i am one. almost to a worrisome level in some regards. i not only look like my father, I act like him and have some of the exact same habits as he does. it is a little disturbing and comforting. my father and i have the same nervous ticks: we both nibble at our knuckles identically. how gross is that?! pretty gross i would say. but anyhoo...

being a daddy's girl has many perks, but for now i must focus on the unfortunates. i feel this series of blogs may be a service to other daddy's girls who are struggling with the overprotective father as a grown up girl...as one is raised a daddy's girl a shield is placed around this girls existence. as is the fathers primary job, a thick layer of protection is put intact upon the girl at a very early age, some may say at birth...or earlier. this is great as a child and a young woman but then BAM! adulthood hits and all those things your father has been doing for you (or in some aspects hiding from you)/protecting you from/etc. hit like a brick wall.

it has taken me a while to decipher some of these mysteries...most at the literal and blatant opposition of my fathers wishes. some i still let him control (or at least make him think he controls) some i have had to fight for...

i have a top ten list of things daddy's keep secret from their girls but will be dividing these up as series to avoid the unending blog entry effect.

1. car stuff

this is by far the worst battle i have ever fought. not only do i get the once over every time i have an oil change or an inspection, but my father controls this aspect of my life still because it is so much easier than dealing with his shit if i do not. it is also certain i will never hear the end of it if something goes awry. my mother suffers from this also. neither of us have ever really been "completely happy" with a car purchase after going through the agonizing process of searching and seeking out cars when needed with my father in tow. we have both just settled on ANY thing after a few weeks...it IS that bad.

when my last auto was agreed upon we could not actually purchase the one we were sitting in and testing driving at the time because I suggested we check out the options at this particular car seller lot. my father had to drive THREE hours away to buy the exact same car but from another man that fitted his criteria. mainly: that HE found himself. (may i add this auto my father chose had a number of issues, i.e. filthy seats, unidentifiable things melted on the fabric in weird places, blown out speakers, a broken gas gauge, etc., etc. but WHATEVER. i was beginning to have homicidal thoughts and would not dream of bringing up any of these issues. car shopping with my dad is just that painful.) so my mother and i have historically agreed to the first thing that is marginally mutually agreed upon. last time, since i had been through this process several times before i thought i had learned my lesson and decided i would only insist on having a particular color automobile. i really did not give a crap what style, size, make, model, etc. i thought i was being reasonable and smart. FAIL. (all i wanted was a black car and i have a grey-blue one in my driveway.)

in addition...
after many years of insisting that the local mechanic, (whose child i went to school with, that was from the same ole southern town we all live in, that knows every.single.person here, that i work out with at the Y everyday) was indeed an honest, hardworking man, my father finally agrees he won't screw me over when i need some car maintenance. now he thinks he is a golden car god and believes everything the man says. i think he might actually have a man crush on him now....BUT mind you, i had to visit his garage in the closet for a few years because my father had to realize this man's potential on his own...alas, he now services his vehicle at the same locale and all is right in this department. (but it seriously took him over a decade)
AND this is after years of dad's "last minute engine checks" which btw, have left me on the side of the road at 7am on the way back to college...

so why? WHY? do you ask, do i continue to seek my father's assistance in the car stuff department? WWWHHYYY? because i heart the crap out of him and don't know shit about cars, that is why. and the man used to live in flint, michigan and worked for GE. it would be a sin not to include him. i am afraid he might seriously cry.

winner: father. keep him, but reluctantly and as sparingly as possible, only under exigent circumstances and at dealerships.