daddy's girl, part 8.

(for previous entries in this series, please refer to daddy's girl, parts 1-7)

8. large purchases aka better to ask santa

my dad never told me that most male retail workers tend to view my appearance similar to the following when i am seeking a large ticket item purchase:

i was not aware that i often walked around looking so helpless and confused but, apparently, this is a fact of life. who knew?!
this explains why my television at home resembles the above picture (ok. i'm exaggerating a little) but it is way old and weighs about 50lbs.

this also explains why i do not have motor operated lawn equipment, a stereo, or speakers, or anything higher than the technical level of a basic lap top and a dvd player in my home or car...

going into retail stores for large purchases is the WORST EXPERIENCE EVER if you are female, at ANY age. i despise it the most. i would rather go to the dentist, the gynecologist AND the dmv on the same day. i would rather wear a bathing suit in public. i would rather eat olives. OLIVES! (and i really, really, really, really, really hate olives)

i am fairly certain that these employees are schooled in the fine art of intimidation, degradation and condescension. very few things scare me off but lord help me, i could go the rest of my life without ever setting foot in a bestbuy, an autozone (and i kinda love this store) or the not labeled but so obviously gender specific section of lowe's (i.e. everything past the lighting department) AGAIN.

if it needs to go inside of this, i'm outta here. my dad pretends like it irritates him but i know he prefers to handle this stuff...which i think is why he uses his i'm not putting up with your crap missy voice every time i tag along to one of the aforementioned locations. and i am 29 years old.

it kinda takes some of the glory out of home ownership. i mean, i still frequent the hardware store. i love a good hardware store. in fact, i hate the hello my name is ___ people so much i try my best to get everything at my teensy little local hardware store. that and i'm a small business supporter. and the store is within my comfort zone.

i actually do all sorts of research in the privacy of my own home before i decide on a big ticket item, to decrease the time required in the store deciding, thus rendering myself vulnerable to the vultures known as hello my name is ___. if i cannot buy it online or quickly, i kinda just go without. i am telling you. it is that bad.

winner: father. just go replace my battery for me. pleeeease. if i have to go in there and get laughed at i will flip. (and i know exactly what kinda of battery my car needs. and i can change my own flat tire. and i am a badass at most yard work. now i just don't want to because they ruined it)