hiberation ain't so bad.

i HATE winter. i used to love it. i grew up in snowy bflo, ny. it was a difficult adjustment once i moved south...(i.e. NO snow on christmas. are you kidding me?) i even stayed near the snowy mountains for college. in the nnw it never gets super cold, which i really liked. but i am sure, like most people, the rain would have eventually gotten to me...although it would have taken a long, long, long time. one time i had to drive to montana because i really missed snow. i got stuck in a blizzard in idaho and almost killed myself and my car, ending up at a spooky truck stop and drank beers with some alcoholic pilots...their "glory days" stories will make you stay FAR away from planes...then i accidentally walked out on my tab and snoozed in my car until it was safe to drive back...but that another story for another day.

so i converted. sold my soul to the south. LOVE the summer. BRING ON the heat, the humidity, outside play, OUTSIDE! every fall now i get a little depressed...bringing out my leather boots cheers me a bit but then it's back to cold weather contempt when the dogs INSIST on getting me out of my warm, cozy bed. i pout. i complain a little. a grouch appears. then i get over it. being grouchy takes it toll, after all.

sooo...introducing the top five BEST things (according to me) about winter!!!

1. MORE SLEEP!!!

my super inspiring, head-on-her-shoulders friend n and i discussed this last year. winter=an excuse to sleep more. don't feel like getting up and out of your super cozy bed? DON'T! sleep a little longer, relish the covers and the warmess (or at least get back into the bed-please let the dogs out if they need to go i don't recommend ignoring them...nor does your carpet. or floor... you get the hint)...don't ignore your yawn, INDULGE in it! take a nap, a snooze, go to bed at 8pm...whatever! enjoy the extra S.L.E.E.P.





2. TIME TO EAT HOT STUFF!!!
as in temperature hot.
soup tastes better when it is cold outside. hot cocoa is a wintertime STAPLE. pasta is more comforting. mac n cheese? nuf said. take the time to eat, enjoy and be internally warmed by hot stuff.

burberry fall
3. EXTRA PADDING!!!

layers layers layers....scarves, sweaters, tights, vest, jackets, boots, socks, leggings, hats, muffs, wraps...etc., etc...eat a little too much of the aforementioned hot stuff? not a problem! throw on a couple extra t-shirts, long sleeved wonders and a cute little coat and no one will ever know you have some extra padding attached to your body. you've got a few months to worry about getting rid of it so PACK IT ON. or in.


4. FOG!!!
it is just awesome and doesn't come around as much in other seasons.




5. THE GREAT COLD RUSH!!!

in winter you get to wrap yourself up and rush to the car...into the building...over there, over here, and FAST, lest your nostrils freeze together. I LOVE THIS! it makes everything feel so thrilling! and getting where you need to be is like a race or a big deal...who cares if it is lame once you get there...getting there was so challenging and whew! what an adventure! it makes me happier to see those i am visiting. my destination is sweeter upon arrival. i feel accomplished.



and if you disagree, well, refer to numero uno.

wahhh wah wah.

look. i don't mean to put a bummer on man meat monday (and tomorrow i have dedicated a post to the positives of winter) BUT i am stuck at home after several days of blizzard of 2009ing. still.

i couldn't go to work this morning cause of the icy road & i went to bed too late...so after missing half the day i was like "muahaha, perhaps i'll use this day to play semi-hooky and head to raleigh to meet some bff's from college." i have to use a vacay day (which i am pissed about) and raleigh didn't get squat so i figured i could safely head south east. 1st fail. boo. sad. at least i could have salvaged this day to be worth it but instead i am writing this and watching 3 dogs and a cat snore on my bed. which is totally cute but not lifting my mood.


i parked my car at the top of the street next to the main road thinking the 40 feet to the road would be feasible. 2nd fail. my car is stuck in several inches of wet snow that even if removed would then have to venture onto the four solid inches of ice that prohibit me from the lovely, cleared main road that is rivermont ave. also, i live in an neighborhood that is pretty low on the totem pole for street cleaning, as if the southern style way of snow clearing were working...i watched several people skid and get stuck and it was obvi that there won't no moving round here.

then i came home and decided on several chores that needed completion only to find that my graceless fall last night on previously mentioned solid inches of ice had a bit more of an effect on me. i pulled some part of my back and am extremely ouchy and grouchy. 3rd fail.

at least i have soup. lots of lovely soup.

mmm: happy chrismakkuh!

obvi adam brody is a babe. i have a super awesome friend, h and we used to spend a significant amount of time watching the oc. we actually have a slight obsession with teen dramadies that star grown adults acting as age inappropraitely eloquent hotties. i l.o.v.e. teen dramadies.

each season of the oc the dudes are unique. aaand seth is always hot. i always felt bad for summer roberts/rachel bilson when i found out that she dated seth cohen/adam brody but then they broke up and continued to date on the show. i bet they were all like "screw you." "no, eff you." action! "i love you, summer." (kiss kiss)" "you too, cohen." (awkward oc hug). that's rough, girl.

we all have a few geeks we are into...when i was sick i watched some of the oc on hulu and i miss my little cohen...

best love song in my book.

i think this is the most romantic song EVER. my mom and i have always loved it. i think it reminds her of vietnam and having a husband solider that she wrote to and lived a different life from. it wasn't intended as a "war song" but became one. (cause no one was able to jump a plane home when they got dumped via snail mail in vietnam) a majillion people have covered this song. the box tops version has always been my favorite and i'm happy to report they were pretty damn hot...




i totally dig bobby darin and was surprised to see his version. it is not at all typical bobby darin. it's got some soul. go bobby.




al green's version is pretty sweet, of course. his version is way sadder but definitely not as desperate as the original...




joe cocker creeps me out in person but he's a badass and his version gives desperation a new meaning...



i've always been bummed that this song is really only 2 minutes long and like, two verses. but i'm always like, dude! i really think you should call her first! it sounds like she may have already "not been able to live without you no more" and once you get off of that (surely tres expensive) air-o-plane ride...the chances of your baby being with your best friend or gas station attendant are probably pretty high...consult female friend before doing anything rash!...sorry, it's just the truth.

i don't think people do desperate love like this anymore. which is a good thing overall, but makes for an excellent song.

ooo baby, it's cold outside.

so it flippin' snowed like crazy tonight. there is a general panic in my town every time snow is predicted and i am pleased when the foreboding is substantiated cause i hate an empty threat. such a waste.
today's snow was awesome. it didn't started until AFTER i drove to c-ville and back. i still got to visit the puppies my mom is fostering. i played with a mini dump truck and a scoop in the snow with one of the best 3 year olds i know. he even snuggled me at the sad part of the jungle book. someone fed me dinner. we laughed a lot. my feet never got wet or cold cause my uggs that i bought for my 26th birthday in august are dope...i had a few bourbons with my bff, bickered with someone and went home. perfecto.

the snow was out of control at midnight. my street was completely still and blanketed and beautiful. this hasn't happened since like, 1996...

where i grew up, this was considered a slight dusting. i remember winter as a child and it was FUN and full of sledding and snowsuits and skis and please don't go outside with wet hair cause it WILL break off (totally did once). and fruit roll-ups freeze quickly and will bust your teeth...anyhooo, i digress...i HATE the winter now. H.A.T.E. as a kid, you don't have to drive anywhere or worry about stuff....

BUT. the snow is wonderful. i have never stopped loving the snow. two of my dogs love it. in the south you get snowed in. and have an excuse not to go out. it is sweet. and this time ain't letting up. tomorrow i have tons of stuff to make several crock pot soups with...have a disc of "the state" and "gossip girl" on dvd and absolutely nowhere to be.

this snow might just be the best. snow. ever.

daddy's girl, part 7.

(for previous entries to this series please refer to daddy's girl, parts 1-6)

7. why boys do what they do

i got dumped one time in college and it was the bad, not only my heart but my skin is ripping off and everything is pouring all over the place, kinda being dumped. throw on a thick layer of clinical depression and no self esteem and there you have me at the time. i needed to go home for a few days but i could barely get out of bed/off the floor long enough to get my clothes together and then my car wouldn't start. then the world ended (or so i thought). anyhoo...got on the phone and was able (by the grace of my dear friends) to get home for a few days. one of those phone calls was to my parents house and my dad answered the phone and sounded like someone had beheaded his puppy in front of him. he was so choked up he couldn't really talk to me and passed the phone on...

i figured out that my dad's heart, in turn, was also broken. he's not the big, intimidating, i've got a shotgun and i will abuse my ownership of it to threaten you boy type of man...in fact, he's equally as liberal as i am when it comes to gun rights...but he gets PISSED if you eff with me. when my dad gets pissed, he completely clams. zips his lips. turns red in face, whiter in the hair...and you are on his shitlist for life.

so i wonder why my father never gave me the why boys do what they do warning...first of all, i don't think he could actually handle discussing in depth the topic of me and a male being intimate...(which is kinda ok with me...or maybe he tried but my attention span was so short i left the conversation before he got to the point)...another theory i have is that my dad was one of those guys when he was younger...therefore, telling me the secrets would be exposing his true self as a young male, destroying my perfect image of him...nahhh.

a few times, while hiking/walking with my dad (that is how we bond)...we have talked about my past relationships. he tells me about the last time he saw/talked to/wanted to maim them and kindly points out a character flaw or anomaly in their dress or demeanor...and then he usually makes jokes as to what d-bags they were...he's always been nice to them but i really doubt i have ever brought home a boy he has genuinely liked. he really likes a lot of my guy friends because i am pretty sure he knows they won't ever see me naked.

so why hasn't dad given me fair warning on what to look for in men? eeeeasy...then numero uno status is in jeopardy. he could have given me tips on what to look for, but i am glad he hasn't. i've figured it out of my own...(which is probably why i prefer to be single. ) and the thought of talking about the tendencies of the opposite sex i am involved with amongst my fathers ears makes me a little uncomfortable...actually it terrifies me and is gross and i never want to touch that topic with a ten foot pole.

winner: father. if you have a dad that is worthy of numero uno status-always keep him there. or at least always make sure he thinks he is numero uno. (and throw in that "it's so difficult to find someone i like because my example of what to live up to is so amazing"...it's true and brings on waterworks EVERY time)

so happy together...

i went to lowe's on black friday because i needed to buy a sliding glass door and now i am a grown up and get excited about buying doors. lame. AND because a week earlier i was setting my sights on the current object of my affection...my new crockpot. the dude at lowe's told me to "wait" (wink wink) until black friday to buy it and i am super glad i did. i got that beauty for ten bucks.
so far we have made some pretty banging soups. next week i am going to make a beef stew and i can't wait. there is even a recipe for ribs in the manual. RIBS. did you know you can make RIBS in a crockpot? score.

so i wanted you to know how happy i have been since i acquired my crockpot. i was vying for one for a looong time and now we can live a long, prosperous, warm, slow cooked future together.

coming to an end...

i have been in training for two weeks now and this is my last day. i am super glad. i miss my home, my pets, my life. richmond is a great place to visit and i love that i can get around easily and not have to "travel" too much. but i cannot wait to get back...
radiohead always makes me feel comforted and calm...

i love this little fan video! the little paper people are so cute!

title track.

i had a terrible, horrible, no good kittens & rainbowy day. a painfully kittens and rainbowy day. i've been in training for the past week and although the content was a little dull and the only thing i learned on the 1st day last week was that the trainer had a borderline unhealthy relationship with gambling and a racist bigot mother...but it was not the worst training ever.
sitting still is not my thing. but i have found sitting still with a room full of criminal justice majors is much better than a room full of social workers. sooo much better. and it is much more fun and sarcastic. there is only like, one person who is the psych major with all of the (wrong) diagnosis' under their breath and half of the trainers are ex-delinquent with really bad tattoos that are fun to look at.
...i spoke too soon. TODAY. WAS. AWFUL. the morning was set for mental health issues and the afternoon for substance abuse. both of these topics i am substantially familiar with but always learn something new so i was looking forward to the week...the drive was bad...icy roads then blinding fog...but my "tis winter time oh nine" mix is still sweet and somber so the drive didn't get to me. the morning presenter (despite the fact he had NO visuals. just talking.) was even marginally entertaining. he totally sounded like mitch hedberg.
***story alert! i went to see mitch hedberg once at a comedy club and he never showed (which ended up being a good show and then we got free tickets to another show and we saw bob saget and it WAS AWESOME) anyhooo, we were all like, "omg. hope hedberg isn't dead. isn't he a drug addict?" well. he was dead. and an addict. awkward.***
so this afternoons speaker had the worst presence ever, kept calling us "folk" (not folks just folk)and went off on a random tangent about a theory of SA that had no relevance to the public service worker. there were a lot of red arrows and random letters on a story board. he also kept calling us "case managers" which drives me frickin batty.

pathetic highlights of the afternoon:
1. apparently there was a drug king pin named "dump truck smitty" in va along the I-95 corridor that used a laundry business and dump trucks for cover at his heroin production and distribution company. no one else was laughing at the name except for me...what is wrong with these people?
2. direct quote from trainer: "look, folk. you need to get on the exact same level as the drug dealer." wtf?
3. at lunch this dumb girl was arguing the difference between opiates and poppys and heroin when i attempted to explain the correlation and mentioned the scene from the wizard of oz as an example she replied, "i've never seen that movie. ever." LIAR. then she proceeded to tell me she hated all of the food on my plate. like i give a crap.

the last hour was spent rediagnosing and judging a substance exposed, product of lifelong neglect, gang related, promiscuous, clinically chemically dependent hypothetical individual into weekly AA meetings and GED classes to solve the problems of the world. it was turrible. i went well beyond the point of trying not to bust out laughing...and literally got to the point of tears when i saw how serious and determined everyone else in the room were when they thought they had done an adequate job of "fixing" this imaginary client. i realized that i (29 year old me) was one of the top contenders in the room for "having harsh, real and confrontation discussions with people about their problems." and now i am jaded. it just broke my heart and solidified all that is denial and are you effing kidding me? with the world.

someone please send me to a farm...

mmm: i've been bitten. or mauled. whatever werewolves do.

so yeah. i haven't read the twilight books. i hate that crap but i have seen the 1st movie. twice, actually. not intentionally, i borrowed it once then forgot i had it on netflix so i rewatched it while making a present for someone. and seriously, who can ignore the hype surrounding this film? as a regular online reader of trashy celebrity gossip i am sure you were as surprised to see this guy reemerge as a gorgeous specimen of all things dark and handsome... love the northwestern native american art...after spending much time there in geeky museums, i thoroughly appreciate the accurate correlations to the natives of the geography...

damn.

shooo.

i am really glad this dude got his this go round. they (i assume and hope purposefully) made him look super frumpy in the first film and if he looks anything like he does in these shots in that movie... I CAN'T FREAKING WAIT TO SEE IT. sorry, it is true. i confess. but i will wait...i refuse to go with a bunch of screaming tween groupies. i have learned to lust on the inside, it has taken years, and i am good at it.

a plaid tie?! are you trying to send me to an early grave little lautner?! niiice choice.

(i haven't been this excited for a man meat film since fight club. and i REALLY like fight club. in all reality, i know there is nooo way the twilight series will beat a film with brad pitt, ed norton and (blessed be) jordan catalano covered in sweat and blood...but i feel the same excitement when i think about the fateful day i will see this guy and rp on screen. and i bet the blood and sweat content will be on similar levels. yessss!)

dubitably.

i've spent the last decade being professionally investigative in various jobs...this has generally been pretty fun but now i find myself kinda wary of everything in the whole wide world. the second i let my guard down about dumb stuff BAM: reminded of why i am so weird about honestly and loyalty and blah blah blah.

i never thought i would like this band, pretty much because their name is lame and it totally turned me off. but i reeeally like their last album and LOVE this song right now...

i can count on one hand how many elvis songs i like. but he died on the same day as my birthday so i feel it is only right to have a few favorite elvis songs.
the other day in the car i was listening to mmj then i turned on the radio and this elvis song came on. so i took this to mean that my apprehension in life is warranted. thanks elvis and mmj. (i am sorry i judged you by your band name and your creepy hairstyles. but that is just how i feel. )

as i am sure you have learned by now...these cheesy "made it myself, mom" youtube videos are terrible. sorry.